Five reasons to start planning your own funeral, and tips on where to begin
Planning your own funeral arrangements isn’t just practical, it’s a gift to yourself and those you love.
Most of us, even those in the later decades of life, aren’t thinking about a plan for their funeral. Death, including what happens leading up to it and what comes after, isn’t a topic we typically discuss at the dinner table — for many, it’s a scary thought, and conversations about our own mortality can induce stress and anxiety.
However, at SendOff, we know being a participant in your own planning process can actually be a positive, even enjoyable experience. We also know the best, most memorable funerals or celebration-of-life events are the ones people have planned for themselves. And maybe, even more importantly, pre-planning is a gift to those you love.
“When families don’t pre-plan and are faced with making arrangements, they’re often so deep in their grief that the planning process can be daunting, adding just another layer to the challenges they’re already dealing with,” says Colby Voigt, Licensed Funeral Director at SendOff. “Families often don’t remember much after the whirlwind of decision making, and some families even have regret over the choices they made.”
At SendOff, we encourage people to pre-plan for a number of reasons. Here are just a handful.
Why should you plan your own funeral?
Talking about your own death and planning for it can actually help you live better in the here and now. As you think about how you want to be remembered, you may discover yourself paying more attention to the purpose of your actions, how you spend your time, and who you spend it with.
Personalizing your own service or celebration makes it more meaningful for those who attend. When guests know you chose the music, food, readings, and activities, your presence can be felt more deeply, and your grand finale is more memorable. At SendOff, we empower you to think outside the traditional walls of a funeral home and think about meaningful ways to celebrate your unique life.
Planning your own arrangements puts you fully in control. If you have specific wishes for what happens to your body after you die, whether you choose cremation (by water or fire), burial, or donating your body to science, pre-planning ensures your wishes are met after your death.
A pre-planned service is a gift to those you love — it reduces the number of decisions that must be made following your passing, giving them time and mental capacity to focus on coping with your loss and healing. Having to plan a loved one’s funeral while in the throes of grief can be extremely difficult and stressful, and many people make hasty decisions they later regret. Taking proactive steps to planning is a way of “being there” when it matters most.
You can pay for specific arrangements in advance, or have a better understanding of costs so that you can budget appropriately or know what to contribute to your funeral fund. Because death demands immediate monetary costs, and those costs can create an unexpected burden on families, pre-planning can help you and your family make smarter decisions and alleviate financial hardship for your survivors.
Get started with a pre-planning guide
Below are the basic elements you’ll want to consider as you start planning. If you prefer to do this in conversation with SendOff, we’re here to support you along the way — call us now at (612) 236-0141 or complete our pre-planning form.
Cremation, burial, body donation: SendOffs licensed funeral directors can talk to you about choices, including eco-friendly options, available to people living in the state of Minnesota.
Location of service: You can choose one of SendOff’s vendor partners or choose a venue of your own.
Style of service: Simple and intimate or elaborate, loud, and lively. What service details are important to you? Think food, music, selected readings, and any tangible mementos for guests (like cigars, holiday ornaments, bookmarks, candles, etc.).
Budget and funding methods: If you know your budget in advance, that can be especially helpful in making specific decisions. And while pre-paying is an option, it’s not a requirement at SendOff. If you wish, you can set aside money in a funeral savings account that you contribute to leading up to your departure.
Your final resting place: Is it in a cemetery, in the ground or a columbarium, an urn in someone’s home, or do you want your ashes scattered? Your religion may play a role in your decision.
Document your pre-plan and then share it
Whether you choose to document your wishes digitally (saved to the cloud or on a thumb drive) or on physical paper, sharing your end-of-life plans is critical to ensuring they’re carried out. You can include your wishes in your will or within a separate document. Once your plan is in writing, notify your loved ones of its existence. You may find this conversation to be more challenging than you expected, and SendOff staff are here to help you facilitate these discussions if necessary.
SendOff can also help with documentation and keeping it safely stored until it’s needed.
And remember, once your preparations are made, they don’t have to be final. You can continue to alter your plans so long as those changes are documented and saved. Of course, none of us hope they’ll be put into action anytime soon, but when the time comes, your loved ones will be thankful and better prepared for your ultimate SendOff.
“A pre-plan gives your surviving family members the opportunity to connect and be there for each other during a tough time,” says Colby. “It also gives families time for physical and mental rest. Ultimately, it allows them to be more present as their loved one is dying and later, during their memorial service.”
Start the pre-planning conversation with SendOff
At SendOff, we have a lot of admiration for people who spend the time to plan future funeral arrangements, whether for themselves or other family members. If you’re ready to start the conversation, and you’re looking for compassionate experts to help you plan a meaningful and memorable celebration of your life, call us now at (612) 236-0141 or complete our pre-planning form.
